Brief outline of my mental health journey…

Hi all. And welcome to my blog. I am here starting this blog for the first time.

I want to make this blog about the experiences of mental health and the journey that the majority of people with mental health face.

I want to be able to share those experiences of mental health and not make negativity my main subject of focus. I want to be able to embrace the whole idea of mental health and that it is okay to discuss it openly..

But before I make any more blog posts about the present and future, let me explain to you my journey to today. The present day.

My mental health journey began officially when I was thirteen/fourteen. But I never really properly knew until I was sixteen. Ever since I’ve lived with mental health issues. The specific mental health issues I am and have always lived with are: social anxiety, general anxiety disorder and depression.

And fast forward to today, here I am, still alive and well. Nice and healthy attending my studies.

So that’s my journey so far until today and a brief look into my past.

Thank you for reading.

I hope you all will find my posts interesting, and will happily read them all, including this one. And feel free to comment your thoughts and opinions.

Advertisements

Germany

Hi guys and welcome back to another post.

So I will be writing about my travels to Germany. I recently went there for a few days to visit my aunt. We went to Düsseldorf which is a beautiful city.

Since we landed on a public holiday, all the shops were closed but I still went outside with my aunt and her friend. They showed me around the area and I managed to get some nice pictures outside.

The second day we went to köln (or cologne) which is 30 minutes away by train from where I was staying, just a little outside of Düsseldorf. It was a fun experience, I enjoyed it a lot. I took a lot of pictures on this day and by now is shared on the ‘2019 Travels’ tab of my blog site. So have a look there for some of my holiday pictures.

Overall, Germany is a lovely country with stunning scenery and countryside. It is breathtaking and I wish I could have spent more time there. But there is always a next time. So until next time, I’ll cherish the memories that I have created so far in Germany.

Here are some pictures from my holiday:

Thanks for reading. X

My love for writing

Hi guys and welcome back to another blog post.

In this post, I want to discuss my passion for writing.

I used to be a writer a few years ago. I use to write some novels and books about anything that came to mind. And I blew up pretty big. On one of my old novels I wrote, I had 21k reads and 500 votes. Another one of my stories had 100 reads and 30 votes.

I started out thinking my stories won’t be much of a big hit. And I just thought ‘you’re just writing for fun right now. So don’t take it seriously.’ But when I noticed that more people were reading my stories and enjoying them, it was a really good time for me.

Even though writing was something I never took serious back then and I didn’t really think I’d grow, I still did. But not enough to be able to have readers watch sponsored advertisements to get paid out of it and to have a hard cover version of my stories on amazon.

However, when I started blogging, that’s when I stopped writing officially. I wanted to pursue blogging rather than writing. And I did that. The more I blogged, the less and less I wrote stories. So I just kept up with blogging ever since.

Thank you for reading. X

Too scared to film.

Hi guys.

I’ve decided to write something a little different. I decided to write about myself which I rarely do on my blog.

I know most of you don’t care to know about me and you only care for the content I write. But this time, it’s different. And if you really don’t care, then jog on. This post isn’t for you.

I am writing this because I am too scared to film again. Last year I did a bit of filming over the summer. And it was a great experience. But unfortunately, it stopped there. During that time, I got comfortable using the camera and what not. But coming back to England and continuing it, was a scary thought. I backed it immediately and anxiety has got to me. Since then my anxiety has been overtaking my life in terms of not being able to get back to filming. It literally has not let me get over this one small hiccup and allow me to build the courage to film again.

Back when I started, I was scared of being judged. After the first video, it was my foot was brought the door and I did a little more. And then I stopped. And once I wanted to start again, I got be cold feet and was scared ever since.

You must be thinking, “what am I so scared of that isn’t letting me film again?

Well I’ll tell you what is (scaring me) stopping me to film again. Judgement. I fear that you all and a lot more of this world will judge me for doing what I do. For posting videos about mental health.

I am scared prying eyes won’t take their eyes off me and they will talk about me negatively. Yes, there will be people who will hate on me and I can’t help that they’ll do that. But my mind doesn’t allow me to think rationally. There’s a tiny voice in my head telling me you are worthless and you aren’t worth getting back in front of the camera again.

And also I don’t know how to edit for Shit. It’s hard to edit so I leave my stuff the way it is. Yes, you can say I am insecure about filming again. But what can I do when the voice in my head, the anxiety isn’t letting me? It’s hard not being able to continue what I started.

I feel like I’ve gotten all of people’s hopes up when I started filming only to let them down. If you are one of those people and if you ever watched the videos on my channel, I am sorry, I let you down. I feel very bad for letting the anxiety get in my head and tell me that I’m too worthless to film again. You know why? Because I probably am.

As I’m writing this, I was struggling to admit this to you all because I find it difficult to open up and show my vulnerabilities to the world. But I am glad I did. Because I didn’t know what else to do. I didn’t know how else to do it. This is the reason why I’ve not filmed for a year. And I’m sorry for that. I truly am. I feel like I owe my viewers something just because I have not filmed in such a long time.

I am sorry.

Thank you for reading. X

Upcoming Travels

Hi guys and welcome back to another blog post.

As you all know, I have a love for travel and I want to be able to share with you all my travel plans for this summer. I am very much excited about it all and I am glad I have something to look forward to.

In a few weeks, I will be going to Germany with my mum and grandmother (my mums aunt). It should be an exciting trip for me because I’ve always wanted to go to Germany. I will be going to Düsseldorf specifically.

Germany is country I’ve wanted to visit for a while and I am glad I am going there. It’s becoming another country to tick off my bucket list and a small goal I can tick off my list too. I will be sure to take a lot of pictures to share with you all on the 2019 travels tab of my blog site. So be sure to look out for some pictures on there whilst I’m there or once I get back. I am hoping it’ll be lots of fun and nothing less.

I will also be going back to Abu Dhabi as well in July. I didn’t get to go out much last time I went but hopefully this time around with some money saved, I will be able to do a lot more exploring and I will make sure to take pictures for it all.

I know this is a short post but I just wanted to share this with you all since you all are my family here on WordPress. And I want to able to share these exciting milestones and goals with you all. I hope you all will look forward to seeing some photos coming as much as I am hoping to have fun whilst I’m there.

Thanks for reading. X

Mental health is not just “a western thing”

⚠️ TRIGGER WARNING: THIS POST WILL DISCUSS CONTENT OF RAPE AND SUICIDE. PLEASE DO NOT READ IF YOU FEEL YOU ARE SENSTIVE DUE TO PERSONAL OR PAST EXPERIENCES.

THANK YOU IN ADVANCE!!! ⚠️

—-

Recently, I have been inspired to write this post because I’ve watched some troubling documentaries that are about mental health, suicide and rape.

I just want to bring to light to everyone that mental health isn’t just a “western thing”. Mental health should be recognised as an international and worldwide issue in countries across the world including those that are high in poverty and low in employment.

Mental health and suicide exists in countries across many continents in the world.

Issues such as rape and suicide exists in these poverty ridden countries. And personal experiences and family life lead to mental health issues amongst those living in poverty. And those mental health issues such as depression and anxiety lead to self inflicted death, in other words, suicide.

There is also no safety in these countries where there is a lot of poverty. Women and children (sometimes men) are getting raped and murdered straight after. Some are lucky enough to live but they have to deal with psychological effects of it all.

There is no form of help in these countries. The kind of help we get here in the UK. There is no therapy, there is no counselling.

And if you think medication is another option for them to get treated for mental health, it isn’t. They see mental health as a taboo forget taking medication for it. Taking medication for mental health is also seen as a taboo in those countries.

The whole point of this post is to just put it out there and bring to light that mental health should not be westernised. It is not a western issue. Mental health is a world wide issue.

And just like it is here, over in those countries, mental health is always stigmatised. Men and women don’t talk about their mental health issues.

So what we need to do is to talk about mental health as a worldwide issue. Not as a “western” issue.

Do not make it a westernisation thing. Mental health doesn’t exclude anyone. Mental health is experienced by everyone from all walks of life. Regardless of whether we are rich, dirt poor or living comfortably. Mental health doesn’t exclude no one.

—-

If you ever want to watch the documentaries I speak of, I shared it on my Twitter recently. So follow me on there to find the links at @faizablogs

If not, I’ll drop the links here:

My neighbour the rapist: https://youtu.be/rpjNz8VrXFk

Suicide stories: Are Kenya’s men in crisis? https://youtu.be/NClMdqEIUDM

Thank you for reading. X

Positive inspiration

Hi guys and welcome back to yours truly and her blog.

I want to discuss positive inspiration which I’ve seen a lot of positivity and inspiration from a few people who I am dedicating this post to. By the time I’ve written this post, I will have messaged them both a unique and positive message to them both.

But recently these people have inspired me to be more positive in my life no matter how hard it is, in the moment. They have inspired me to just keep going, no matter how hard it gets.

Everyday, I am mentally drained thinking about how to stay positive within myself. But I feel like I’ve given out so much positivity that I have none left. But with the help of two very special people who I follow on Twitter, they unknowingly have been an inspiration to me. And they have unknowingly helped me realise that something good will come around. Something better. Something that will help me and give me the extra push that I need to get to where I want to be. No matter how long it’ll take.

And the people that have inspired me and have given me hope and positive inspiration: @pigletish and @itsnicolecarman

That’s why I am dedicating this post to them because they are such positive people.

I don’t know about anyone else but I struggle to keep positive on a daily basis. As much as I’d like to joke around, as much as I love my current job and my family….. I still find it difficult to open up and fully put myself out there. To them and the world. I only show half of myself to them. And less than a quarter of myself to the world on twitter.

But to see others, like theses amazing girls, so comfortably tweet about their life in general and also about their struggles and hardships. I wish I could do that. I wish I could do what they do and just tweet about my life freely just as they do without fear of judgement.

I’d like to think they feel at home with their online friends and the mental health community. I wish I was as brave as you both. And you both have inspired me to make a change in my life recently (which I’d like to not share in this post).

But I just want to thank you both Nicole and anneli for being nothing other than just yourselves. You guys are the true definition of authenticity.

Thank you for being yourselves.

The reason I wrote this post is because sometimes you get your inspiration from the least expected. You never know what or who may have a huge positive impact on you.

X

Mental health in the workplace

Hi everyone and welcome back to another glorious post.

I want to discuss mental health in the workplace and how much importance and recognition mental health deserves within a workplace. Mental health is something that exists and is very real. And it is a little more into the light with employers. But only to a certain extent. I say this because employers say mental health is a concern for them when it comes to their employees experiencing it. But those are just words being said, which they never follow through with.

I’ve noticed a lot on twitter and I’ve realised in real life discussions I’ve had with friends, that employers are all bark but no bite when it comes to enforcing concerns about their employees mental health and wellbeing. It is truly an understatement that they don’t care. They claim to care but if they genuinely had real concerns which I am assuming they do, why not take action?

There are a lot of ways to help an employee in a workplace. If they don’t feel up to coming to work due to wellbeing and/or mental health reasons, you should allow that with no consequences at all. If an employee feels down at work and has no one to talk to, be that ear to listen for them. Or even hire a qualified counsellor or therapist to attend the workplace temporarily, long term, short term. Whatever suits your budget but anything to help your employee(s). Or even set up a support group within the workplace amongst work colleagues and be a support network for the employees and also get the employees to be a support network for each other.

Sometimes it is very helpful to talk to colleagues at work. And I don’t mean tell them your whole life story. But whenever you feel unwell, let someone know. As an employer, be that someone that your employee can approach and talk to. Be easily approachable for your employee to feel comfortable enough to be talking to you about their mental wellbeing.

It is critical that employees get the help they need in order to function well at work. I cannot begin to tell you the importance of looking after your employees. If something is wrong, just a simple, ‘are you okay?’ would suffice. Go on to ask them if they want to talk about it and if not, that’s up to them. But always be that employer who genuinely cares for the people that work for them.

Thank you for reading. X